The Video Game Trophy Room: Episode 49 - Battletoads
NES: Battletoads
Until next time? How about fuck you. I will never play this game AGAIN! I don't even know how I convinced myself this would be a fun game to beat. I knew how fucking hard it was, and I literally sat here since 10:30am trying to beat it. Aside from a 1 hour break to keep me from stabbing myself in the eyes I was playing most of the day.
I will say this though, The Dark Queen is the greatest evil boss in the world. Not only does she know how to build a fucking fortress, but when you beat her, she just runs away, leaving you feeling like the biggest bitch in the universe. It's like the game developers hate you and wanted you to feel the emptiness in their souls. It's like "Hey buddy, why did you play this game, did you think you were going to have fun, maybe even win? Fuck you douchenozzle, you wasted your time!" Then they came to your house and shoved nails in your dick and pissed all over your bed.
I can say this will all honesty: THIS IS THE HARDEST GAME OF ALL TIME. Never play it. If someone says let's play it, kill them. Or kill yourself. Do something, anything, but never play this game.
The only consolation from playing this piece of shit... is that I know the AVGN would be proud.
... also dancing to the pause theme.
posted by themoogle at 10:50 PM
NES: Battletoads
Until next time? How about fuck you. I will never play this game AGAIN! I don't even know how I convinced myself this would be a fun game to beat. I knew how fucking hard it was, and I literally sat here since 10:30am trying to beat it. Aside from a 1 hour break to keep me from stabbing myself in the eyes I was playing most of the day.
I will say this though, The Dark Queen is the greatest evil boss in the world. Not only does she know how to build a fucking fortress, but when you beat her, she just runs away, leaving you feeling like the biggest bitch in the universe. It's like the game developers hate you and wanted you to feel the emptiness in their souls. It's like "Hey buddy, why did you play this game, did you think you were going to have fun, maybe even win? Fuck you douchenozzle, you wasted your time!" Then they came to your house and shoved nails in your dick and pissed all over your bed.
I can say this will all honesty: THIS IS THE HARDEST GAME OF ALL TIME. Never play it. If someone says let's play it, kill them. Or kill yourself. Do something, anything, but never play this game.
The only consolation from playing this piece of shit... is that I know the AVGN would be proud.
... also dancing to the pause theme.
posted by themoogle at 10:50 PM
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